- Arriving to interview with a stye and a limp (see below.)
- When discussing your extracurricular activities, admitting you only joined the gospel choir in the first place because a Certain Gentleman of Your Acquaintance was in attendance, and you hoped that in all the ShoopShoop-ing and Hallelujahs, your eyes would meet across the crowded room and all other voices would fade away as in your hearts you were singing only to each other...(N.B. This did not happen. It should also be abundantly clear at this point that one of my more charming qualities is my rich inner life.)
- Letting slip that the only reason you joined the staff of the university magazine in the first place was to meet comedians you Find Intriguing (N.B. This is Meedja Slang for "Find Devastatingly Attractive"). I still maintain that this is not stalking, it is journalism.
In short, what I have learnt from this is to LIE MORE. And don't limp so much.