West Wing? More like BEST wing...

"I have wit, I have charm, I have brains, I have legs that go all the way down to the floor, my friend"

"I drink from the keg of glory. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land"

"Why should we go to Mars? Cause it's next. Because we came out of the cave and we looked over the hill and we saw fire. And we crossed the ocean and we pioneered the West and we took to the sky. The history of man is hung on a timeline of exploration and this is what's next."

If for the sake of argument in some kind of Greek-gods-gift-bestowing-upon-me type manner I could write like Aaron Sorkin but in order to do so I would have to be a crack addict...it would be totally worth it.

Comedy Ahoy

So...by a very loose interpretation of the word 'professional'... I am now a professional comedy writer. As they say in Malory Towers, Jubliate! Ok, so, actually I got one joke on radio show that invites submissions, but let's not quibble over facts. It interrupts my pride/boasting. This experience has reinforced two things for me:

1. My Radio Comedy Geekery Radio comedy is awesome. Anyone who says different is an idiot. If you don't know who Laura Solon, Clement Freud or the Penny Dreadfuls are - shame on you. You have brought dishonour upon yourself and the house of your father.
2. My Respect for Topical Comedy Writers It is not easy to think of jokes about the week's news when most of the news coverage is either about an earthquake which has killed thousands, or the attempted suicide of a Prime Ministers wife. Of course, there are some who would say this is what comedy is for - to make the unbearable, bearable - to shine a light into the darkest of places. Thankfully I did not have to grapple with such deep issues as I wrote a joke about tits.

Talking of radio comedy - one of the very loose aims of this blog was to discuss how I stave of the dispair of living a directionless existence, and radio comedy definitely fits into this category. If you didn't know that you can see recordings of BBC stuff for free by going to http://www.bbc.co.uk/tickets ... well you do now. If you've not seen a dwarfish Danish lesbian attempt to make jokes about the news whilst getting off her face on fortified wine made by monks, you've really got to take a good look at your life and ask yourself what the hell you are doing. I love Sandi Toksvig.

Just so you know I'm not delusional: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00q0771

Blogtastic (or similar hilarious title)

So, I just watched Julie and Julia, in which a dejected Amy Adams decides to cook all of Julia Child's recipes in a year, blogs about it and basically has a happy ending. As well as now being extremely hungry, and wishing I could attend cooking classes in 1950s Paris, I have come to the conclusion that writing a blog is the way to fix my life.

I do this with pretty much every film I see - All The President's Men made me wish I was an investigative journalist. Save the Last Dance made me wish I'd never given up ballet and that I lived in a 'hood' instead of Surrey... goodness knows what will happen when I finally get round to watching Avatar - odds are I'll develop a sudden urge to join the Blue Man Group and convey the woes of the planet through interpretive dance. Probably.

Rather than try and complete all Gordon Ramsay's recipes in a year or something, I will attempt to chronicle my quest to find gainful employment/ somebody to love (though preferably not simultaneously, I'm not that kind of girl), detailing the many ways in which both these quests are failing, and how I try and amuse myself and stave off depression along the way. Enjoy...